Stop the Violence

Last week I saw a tweet sent out by The Single Woman and it stuck a nerve.
Ladies, if a man hits once, he WILL hit you again. Please don’t be fooled into believe otherwise. 
This is so so true.
How do I know?
Because I have been hit.
Because I have been a victim of domestic violence.
Now before I go on I want to say that I am not putting this out there to have a pity party.
Quite the opposite actually.
I am putting this out there in hopes that if someone if just one of my readers is a victim of domestic violence maybe reading my story will be the wake up call they need to get help.
Being a victim of domestic violence is no fun.
It’s scary.
I know in my own experience I was scared out of my mind.
I wanted to get help but I didn’t know how to ask for it or who to turn to.
I pretended that everything was fine.
I would walk around with bruises and prentend they weren’t there.
I would walk around with my head hung low and a look of shame on my face.
I would walk around thinking that I was the only one in the world in the position I was in.
I would walk around SCREAMING for help inside.
But ya know what? I wasn’t the only one in the world in this position.
Did you know that domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women between the ages of 15 and 44.
Did you know that 3 to 4 MILLION women in the US are beaten in their own home each year by their husbands, ex-husbands, or male lovers.
Did you know that 1 woman is beaten by their husband or male partner every 15 seconds in the US.
Did you know that 1 in 4 women will experience domestic violence in her lifetime.
Most importantly did you know that NO WOMAN DESERVES TO BE A VICTIM of domestic violence.
I know from experience that when you are a victim it is hard HARD to ask for help.
Sometimes it feels damn near impossible to ask for help.
You are scared. 
I was.
You are ashamed.
I was. 
You want out.
I did.
There comes a time in a abusive relationship where it just clicks.
Or at least thats how it went for me.
I was verbally, mentally and physically abused by my ex.
To be honest I didn’t realize I was victim of domestic violence until the day my ex laid his hands on me and it scared the shit out of me. 
He would tell me thing like I was fat, I was ugly, I didn’t deserve to be with him. 
That was all abuse that I didn’t realize at the time was abuse. 
Then there was a day he got so mad at me, for what I honestly don’t remember, that he pinned me against the wall by my throat and punched a hole in the wall next to my head.
THAT is what woke me up.
THAT is what made me realize I was a victim of domestic violence.
THAT is what made me decide I was done and I wanted out. 
If you are in a abusive relationship do not be afraid to ask for help.
Believe me I know it is easier said than done but once you ask for the help and get out of it you will feel like a ton of bricks have been lifted off your shoulders. 
Source: via Nikki on Pinterest
If you or someone you know is in a abusive relationship get help!
Please do not be afraid to ask for help. 
  Hugs, Nikki

I have 9 Lovely Comments, I would love to have yours... on Stop the Violence

  1. avatar
    September 17, 2012

    Such an important issue! Thx for sharing your story and I hope that it passes someone that really needs to read it!

  2. avatar
    P!nky says:
    September 17, 2012

    WOW! I honestly don’t know what to say except I’m SO GLAD you found the help you needed.

    I am so sorry you had to deal with such a scary situation. THank you for sharing your story to help others!

    You are a beautiful, strong, wonderful woman, don’t forget that!


  3. avatar
    September 17, 2012

    Thanks for sharing your experiences. I hope that someone out there who is in the same position seeks help because of your bravery!

  4. avatar
    SEL says:
    September 17, 2012

    Oh friend. I’m so sorry you experienced such ugliness and abuse.

    You wrote a beautiful post and I hope that it reaches the women that need it. Abuse can come in so many forms. What scary statistics you posted. 🙁

    I’m glad you are safe and out of the abusive relationship. You’re a beautiful person, inside and out.


  5. avatar
    lil desiqua says:
    September 17, 2012

    Thanks for posting this. It is a message that seldom gets mention anymore. I’m so happy you were able to recognize the abuse for what it was, get out, and share this us. I really hope it reaches someone who needs it!

  6. avatar
    Allie says:
    September 18, 2012

    That’s such an important message and it’s really amazing and brave of you to share your own experience with something so serious that effects so many women. I’m so sorry you had to go through that and I’m so happy you got help and got yourself out of that girl. You deserve great things!

  7. avatar
    Beth says:
    September 19, 2012

    Girl, thanks for sharing. THis is such an important message! I too am so sorry you ever went through this but you are amazingly brave.

  8. avatar
    Amy Smith says:
    September 19, 2012

    Thank you for this. I don’t think enough women really understand this. In nursing school we learn about this and people share their experiences, whether direct or indirect. It really leaves me speechless. Apparently, some women don’t leave because it’s the only structure in their lives they’ve ever had. Isn’t that twisted??? I mean I can understand if it’s hard because the guy can be SO great the rest of the time, but that structure thing is just indicative that these poor women have been abused in some way all of their lives!

    Anyways, thanks for bringing a reality check to us.

  9. avatar
    Janna Renee says:
    September 22, 2012

    Good for you for getting out of that relationship! You are an amazing woman and a strong girl, so you deserve SAFETY and happiness!

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