When I had #babybigtruck in 2014 I had it set in my mind that I was going to breastfeed her. After she was born she had no problem latching on and I was excited for that because I thought it was a good sign that we would have a good breastfeeding journey. Boy was I wrong.
We were released from the hospital a week after I had her and even though I was letting her latch and pumping in the hospital I was not producing enough milk for her so I had to supplement her which started in the hospital. When we got home I tried to no avail to nurse her and I would let her latch and as soon as she did she would unlatch and she would get frustrated. I would give her a bottle and she would quickly settle down. I was crushed that I was not able to provide for her. 2 weeks after being home I threw in the towel and she was on only formula from then on.
This time around I knew I wanted to try breastfeeding again with #babybigtruck2 and I was optimistic about it. I had the mindset that every pregnancy and baby is different and maybe the same thing applied to breastfeeding.
After delivering #babybigtruck2 she latched right on with no problems like her sister did so I was optimistic still right off the bat. Being that she was in the NICU for the first 48 hours I pumped whatever colostrum I could get for her and had it sent to the nursery. Then when everything happened with me having the anxiety attack and I was separated from #babybigtruck2 so I continued to pump and I started to get milk for her and had it sent to the nursery. I was still optimistic that things were going to work out this time around. The last day I was in the hospital I was nursing her and after she would nurse she would not be content so I would supplement her with some formula just like I had to do with her sister.
We got home from the hospital and I continued to nurse and still after nursing she would still be hungry and looking for more so I continued to supplement. I mad an appointment at The Center for Breastfeeding and that is where I got some answers. After the initial questions of How much are you eating? How much are you drinking? And some other evaluations like checking for tongue tie, latch issues etc the lactation consultant came to the conclusion that I have what is called hypoplasia insufficient glandular tissue. Basically glandular tissue is the milk-making tissue in the breast and I do not have enough of it therefore I do not make enough milk to exclusively breastfeed.
Being that #babybigtruck2 was a premie I knew that ANY milk she could get from me would be beneficial and help her immune system which was important to me so after meeting with the lactation consultant I got on Goat’s Rue and Malunggay supplements the help with my supply. I let #babybigtruck2 nurse whenever she wants and then I usually have to give her some formula as well. There are the occasional times when she is content without the additional formula.
Breastfeeding is hard. I feel like it is even harder when you have an issue like I do. The first two to three weeks there were times when I wanted to throw in the towel but then I would stop pray and remember that #babybigtruck2 was getting priceless antibodies from me and it was only benefiting her even if it was just a little amount that she was getting. I had to remind myself many a time that ANYTHING is better than nothing. I also had and have an awesome husband that is very supportive of my decision to breastfeed and he would encourage me whenever I would start to doubt and get down on myself. Thanks babe!
Like I said breastfeeding is hard but it is more than worth it for my little premie.